[Jack is sitting outside his shitty tent on his shitty, beartrap-coated beach. He's also covered in blood for some weird reason-- not his blood, though.

To explain this, he hauls up pink!Dave into the view of the camera by the back of his shirt. Dave is looking very deadLike "bleeding from multiple wounds and left rotting for a day" dead ( Read more... )

alright all you fuckasses ( Read more... )

can cats eat licorice or does that shit kill them
i cant remember

yknow just
wondering
not for any real reason or anything

okay so just out of curiosity has anyone seen my eye
it looks kinda like this

( Read more... )

so if you didnt understand the lispy fuckface dont go to garden zone 13 ( Read more... )

[See thirteen year old Jack Noir.

See thirteen year old Jack Noir screeching like an injured cat. Why? Well, it might have something to do with the fucking beartrap on his leg.]

Who the FUCK would do this?! Why is this whole fucking beach boobytrapped?! When I find out wh-who did this I'm gonna-- gonna punch you in the goddamn face, and--

[and ( Read more... )

[See icon, multiply rage by ∞.

IRONY.

He's standing in a teleporter that's been busted to hell by hand prints-- someone had a hissyfit. Those invisibullshit hands of his are probably still flailing behind him, not that anyone can see. He is FULL OF UNFATHOMABLE RAGE.]

How fucking long is it gonna take for this to go away?!And I don't want to ( Read more... )

[It's definitely Jack's voice, but the video isn't aimed at him. The only thing visible is a strange broken helmet, sitting on a rock at what appears to be a beach. Nice job cleaning up after yourself, Dave.]

So how long did you think you could hide from me this time, kid? I'm not a fucking idiot. I know you're here, so why don't you stop being ( Read more... )

[The audio crackles on to someone who obviously sucks at computers. Seriously, the hell is up with this holo-bracelet shit? Anyway he fiddles with it a little more before he figures out it's already recording. Oh.

wow it must be weird how familiar he probably sounds to a bunch of people!]Alright, someone better start explaining this 'cause I've ( Read more... )